When He Texts But Doesn’t Call

He texts but doesn’t call. What do you do? Assume he’s not interested or it’s a red flag? Before you do that, watch this video!

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If a man texts but doesn’t call, what does it mean? Is it a red flag? Is he a terrible communicator? Is something wrong? 

In this video, you’ll learn what to do when he texts but doesn’t call.

When He Texts But Doesn’t Call

Why do men text but not call?

 
The only person who can answer that is the man you’re texting. If you prefer talking over texting, let him know.

I think texting is a terrible way to communicate and build connection, especially at the beginning when you’re first getting to know each other.

If you don’t tell him how you feel about texting, he won’t know. So, tell him you would love to talk. I’ll give you a script you can use in just a minute.

Maybe you’re thinking, “If he liked me, he’d call me”. Not necessarily. 

Texting has become the most common (and easiest) way to communicate these days, and unless you let a man know your preference, he probably won’t call. Even if he likes you.

Let’s break this down a bit to understand common texting patterns.

How men text when they like you

If a man likes you, he’ll probably text you every day, maybe even a few times a day. He might share photos of food he’s cooking, places he’s visiting, his pets, his kids, etc. 

He probably feels he’s connecting with you, and you may think it’s sometimes sweet and mostly annoying. Think about it…If he didn’t like you, he would stop texting, right?

And while he may be texting other women the same pics and texts, he’s still communicating with you.

 Another reason he could be texting is he might be shy. It may be the only way he feels comfortable communicating with someone he likes. 

In any case, if you like him, give him the green light. Let him know you prefer talking and getting together. Then see what he says and does.

Texting at different stages of dating

If you’ve just connected via online dating and haven’t yet spoken or met: I recommend getting off text as soon as possible – if you feel a connection. 

You don’t want endless texts that don’t go anywhere, and you don’t want to get attached to someone you don’t know…or the opposite – turned off because texting has no tone or emotion. 

Here’s a sample script to get a guy you met online to call: “I’m enjoying getting to know you. Would you like to exchange numbers and talk  – old school –  to see if we connect?”

If you’ve been dating for a while and prefer talking over text, let him know what you want. A phone call every night before bed? Ask for it. 

Here’s a sample script for that: “I love hearing your voice, and it would make me happy to have a goodnight call every night before bed. Can you do that for me?”

Texting can be flirty and fun if used strategically, especially once you’ve been on a bunch of dates or you’re in a relationship. Until then, keep texts to logistics and facts, not feelings. Where you’re meeting, if you’re running late, etc.

Dating Coach, Matthew Hussey, shares a story about getting from text to calling. He was dating someone, and had fallen into a pattern of texting and not calling for several weeks. 

He saw a missed call from her and immediately called her back.  “It’s so good to hear your voice!”  he said.

“Yeah, we’ve become pen pals”, she answered. When she called him a pen pal, he thought, “That’s not sexy. I want to be seen as the sexy guy.”

He liked that she showed confidence by calling him. Even if you leave a voicemail, it can inspire a man to call you. She also got him to see texting from a negative perspective. 

At the end of the call, she said, “Why is it that every time I hear your voice, it leaves me flustered?” This comment left him feeling desired, and he now associated positivity with calling instead of texting.

 
So, if a guy chooses to text you everyday instead of calling you, it doesn’t necessarily mean there is something wrong or he doesn’t like you. It actually might mean that things are going well. 

If your relationship gets stronger and you tell him talking on the phone is important to you, he will do his best to call you. 

And if he doesn’t, ask yourself, “Do I want to be with a man who doesn’t respect how I need to communicate?”

Remember, if we don’t ask, we don’t receive. And if we don’t receive after we ask, we get to choose whether to stay or go.

If you like these tips and want more support on speaking up and getting your needs met, join my new course, Communication Skills For Better Relationships. 

You’ll always know what to say, how to say it, and when to not say anything at all. lastfirstdate.com/commcourse

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