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Over-functioning in Your Relationships: How to Stop Before You Lose Yourself

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Do you have a pattern of over-functioning in your relationships? Do your partners under-function? Let’s break this pattern now! Debbie came to a session excited and a little unsettled. She had been dating Alan for a few months, and everything about him felt different from what she was used to. He texted back. He made plans. When he said or did something that landed wrong, he apologized and corrected course without being asked twice or getting defensive. That should have felt like relief. Instead, it felt unfamiliar enough to make her a little nervous. Debbie’s last long-term relationship was with a man I’ll call Richard. She did most of the emotional heavy lifting in that relationship: she planned, reached out first, smoothed things over, and read his moods so she could adjust hers.  Over time, that became her definition of what it takes to keep a relationship together…until she broke up with him. So when her new boyfriend started initiating dates and...
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How to Know When It’s Time to Leave a Relationship

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Should I stay or should I go? How do you know if you should leave a relationship? We dive deep in this episode of Last First Date Radio. — Wondering if you should stay or leave a relationship? My podcast guest Francesca Zoia, is a relationship and self-love coach that helps women in long-term relationships feeling confused and stuck in the “should I stay or leave” mental loop, figure out whether they’re in the right relationship.  In this episode: How to know if you should stay or leave Why it’s so hard to leave a relationship How to tell the difference if a relationship needs work or it’s over How to deal with family and friends who don’t support your decision to stay or leave EP 729: Francesca Zoia – How to Know When It’s Time to Leave a Relationship Highlights of this episode: Long-Distance Relationship Challenges  Francesca shared her personal experience of questioning whether to ...
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Rewriting Your Love Story: From Old Wounds to Healthy Choices

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How do you rewrite your love story to choose a healthy partner this time around? Spoiler alert: heal your trauma! — How can you rewrite your love story so you end up in a healthy relationship? Owen Smithyman works with self-aware people who have done significant work on themselves – talk therapy, somatic work, plant medicine, coaching — and still feel something running in the background, making decisions for them or making life difficult. As a Peak States Therapy Practitioner, he helps clients resolve emotional wounds permanently, relate more authentically, and live a more vibrant life. In this episode: How past trauma shapes our choices in dating and relationships The relationship between beliefs and trauma What are peak states, and how are they relevant in dating? EP 728: Owen Smithyman – Rewriting Your Love Story: From Old Wounds to Healthy Choices Highlights of this episode: Why people get stuck in healing Cogni...
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The Subtle Red Flags Nobody Talks About in Dating

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Have you ever overlooked red flags in dating? In this episode, you’ll discover the subtle red flags you might have missed in the past. — Which red flags in dating have you missed? Katharina is an Attachment-Based Specialist and an Emotionally Focused Individual therapist with over 25 years of experience helping couples and individuals build stronger, more resilient relationships. A graduate of Columbia University, she is the Founder and Clinical Director of Love Frontier Therapy Group and has dedicated her career to helping people understand the patterns behind conflict, repair emotional disconnection, and create lasting intimacy. In this episode: The subtle red flags in dating many people miss Warning signs couples ignore early on Deal breakers that might be an opportunity for repair in disguise Instead of running away from conflict, get curious instead EP 727: Katharina Sandizell – The Subtle Red Flags Nobody Talks About in ...
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The Surprising Challenges of Dating a People Pleaser

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If you ever dated a people pleaser, you probably know it’s not all rainbows and roses. Here are the top five challenges to look out for. We tend to think of people pleasers as the easiest ones to love. They say yes to almost everything. They go along with the plan. They never seem to want anything that gets in the way of what you want. That sounds like a dream, right? Wrong! In real life, loving a people pleaser is one of the most frustrating and confusing dynamics you can find yourself in. I’ve coached so many people who describe the same thing: a partner who is kind, agreeable, generous with compliments, and somehow still leaves them feeling unseen. If that’s your story, I feel you. That’s why I’m sharing the top five challenges of dating a people pleaser, and what to do if you find yourself in a relationship with one. The Top Five Challenges of Dating a People Pleaser 1. You never quite know who you’re with A pe...
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How to Build Extraordinary Relationships By Design – Not By Chance

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Would you like to be in an extraordinary relationship? In this episode, learn how to build them by design, not by chance. — Learn how to build extraordinary relationships! Jena Jake is a Compatibility Strategist, speaker, and author who helps successful professionals stop choosing relationships by chance and start creating them by design. Through her signature Love Smarter methodology, she helps clients identify true compatibility, break unhealthy patterns, and build extraordinary relationships rooted in alignment—not luck. In this episode: The difference between chemistry and compatibility Why we attach to certain types How do we become aligned with the right people How to set boundaries in relationships from the start How to become the person you want to meet EP 726: Jena Jake – Building Extraordinary Relationships By Design, Not By Chance Highlights of this episode: Chemistry, compatibility & core coaching conc...
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Stop Dating Potential. Start Dating Who They Actually Are.

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Are you dating potential or paying attention to who they are right now? Dating someone’s potential can lead to heartache. Do this instead. Have you ever fallen for someone’s potential instead of who they are right now? You really like them (except for a few small or not so small things), and you start building a fantasy relationship with that imagined future person. You  overlook a few of the very important deal breakers that are showing up today. It feels like you’re just seeing the best in them. But it relies on someone changing instead of what is actually true about them right now, and over time that gap between the imagined future and the actual present is where a lot of relationships fall apart. Here are five common ways that dating someone’s potential shows up so you can prevent heartache in the future. Stop Dating Potential. Start Dating Who They Actually Are. The Fixer-Upper. You excuse inconsistent communication, chronic disorg...
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