How to Be More Dateable

dateable

Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu believe everyone is dateable. If you’re struggling with modern dating, you must listen to this episode!

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Want to know how to be more dateable? Julie Krafchick & Yue Xu are active daters turned dating insiders, and top influential voices of modern dating, relationships, and connection in the digital world. They’re the authors of How To Be Dateable and the co-hosts of the hit podcast Dateable, which has been named one of the top podcasts about modern dating and relationships by the New York Times, The Huffington Post, Oprah Daily, and more. 

In this episode of Last First Date Radio:

  • What is “dating on your own terms”?
  • What the four dating archetypes represent: Achiever, Dreamer, Energizer, Maverick, and Thinker
  • Some of the traps that get in the way of finding your person
  • One of their favorite exercises from the book
  • Some of the key points they’re hoping readers will take away from the book

EP 645: Julie Krafchick and Yue Xu – How to Be More Dateable

How is your book different from other dating books out there?

We needed to let people know we don’t need to stay in the confines of modern dating. We hope it empowers people to date on their own terms. There’s so much negativity that doesn’t bring us to connection. There is a better way to date.

Tell us about the four dating archetypes that help you become more dateable.

Achiever: Go after what they want, achieve a lot. Downside is they’re not always present. They want to keep things going to get to the next stage. 

Dreamer: Wears their heart on their sleeve, they make great partners because they’re so warm. Where it doesn’t serve is getting lost in the fantasy by seeing the best in them and giving too many chances.

Energizer: Go, go, go daters. Back to back dates. Endless energy on dates. Downside is they don’t take time to pause and reflect on what works for them. All their energy is out, not in. They get drained.

Maverick: Very independent, high standards for self and others, hold your own in relationship, but runs at first sign of something hard to not get hurt. Needs to learn to run towards the person by getting curious and getting information instead of misinterpreting.

Thinker: They overthink, hesitate, are all in their head. They are people who think things through and are open to conversation. Downside is they go into analysis paralysis. They can lose track of the big picture.

What are some of the traps that get in the way of finding your person?

We believe everyone is dateable. What gets in our way is the traps of the modern dating culture. 

The Expectation of Love on Demand: We are in a fast culture. Uber, Amazon, Ubereats are all immediate. We often date like that, looking for an immediate spark.

Settling Paradox: This is where you don’t want to settle for the wrong person, but you settle for bad behavior. 

Validation Trap: Because of the mentality that you’re winning if you’re in a relationship and losing if you’re single put so much pressure on dating. We seek validation, but we’re not always aware of that. 

Relationship Chicken: We do everything in dating that’s the opposite of what we do in a relationship. Fox example, we play games with texting and waiting longer than the other. How can we treat dating as we would treat someone in a relationship. 

What are your final words of advice for anyone who wants to go on their last first date?

Don’t think about dates as first date. Anything can happen in life. Life doesn’t happen in a linear fashion. Bring your best self to every first date, and treat your relationship as a series of first dates. Be yourself, not a ‘date persona’. That’s when the right people come to fruition.

Connect With Yue and Julie

Watch this episode on Youtube

Please subscribe/rate and review the podcast here.

Apply to get FREE coaching on the podcast: https://bit.ly/LFDradiocoaching 

If you’re feeling stuck in dating and relationships and would like to finally find love, sign up for a complimentary 45-minute love breakthrough session with Sandy https://lastfirstdate.com/application

Join Your Last First Date on Facebook https://facebook.com/groups/yourlastfirstdate

Get a copy of Sandy’s books, Becoming a Woman of Value; How to Thrive in Life and Love and Choice Points in Dating; Empowering Women to Make Healthier Decisions in Love and Love at Last: True Stories of Falling in Love Later in Life



from Last First Date https://ift.tt/3raE6tX

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