The Power Of The Pause In Dating and Relationships

power of the pause

What is the power of the pause, and how can it help you have more successful relationships? Watch this video to find out!

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“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.  In our response lies our growth and our freedom” – Viktor Frankl

This is one of my favorite quotes, because it describes the importance of pausing when something triggers us. We don’t react – we respond. In our Western hustle culture, pausing is not encouraged, but it’s one of the most important things we can do to help us have better lives. How can we practice the power of the pause in dating and relationships?

5 Ways The Power Of The Pause Helps You Find Love

#1: It helps you slow down in a busy world. When you’re always doing and going, it’s important to pause from time to time. Maybe you don’t take enough breaks to stretch when you’ve been on the computer all day. Maybe you aren’t drinking enough or stopping to prepare healthy foods. If you pause throughout your day, you’ll feel more rested and recharged. You’ll be in a better headspace for the person you’re dating for the first time or the hundredth time. And let’s face it — who doesn’t like being with someone who takes time to be present, grounded and rested?

#2: It helps you be proactive, not reactive. Taking time to pause when someone says something triggering will help you respond from a place of compassion instead of reactivity. If someone asks you for a favor, take time to pause. “Let me get back to you tomorrow” gives you that space to process the request instead of giving a knee-jerk response. When you’re dating, your partner may want to be intimate before you’re ready. Taking time to pause will help you respond from after you’ve processed and tuned into your core values. You’ll be less likely to resort to people-pleasing and being out of alignment.

#3: It helps your conversations be more impactful. What might your conversation on a date be like if you waited a beat and didn’t jump in with your response right away? Making space for people to talk — letting them feel truly heard — is one of the most profound gifts of connection you can offer someone else. The whole point of dating is to connect and to feel seen and heard. The more you pause during conversation — to process, to allow space — the greater the connection.

#4: It helps you reflect during conflict. In order to stay grounded when your date says or does something triggering, it’s important to pause and reflect. Instead of jumping in right away with defensiveness, stop, breathe, and ground yourself. Ask, “What’s important to you about this topic?” Then listen to understand. Try to be open to their point of view, even if you don’t agree. Thank them for sharing.

#5: It helps you have more gratitude. Another benefit of the power of the pause is it helps you to appreciate your date or partner. When we intentionally pause to consider how much we appreciate another human, it has a two-fold effect. One, it makes the other person feel cared for and loved. Two, it makes YOU feel good. So, pause to express gratitude on a regular basis.

The many benefits of the power of the pause in dating!

Taking a moment before responding shows you’re truly listening rather than just waiting for your turn to speak. It gives you time to process what’s been said and respond more thoughtfully. Leaving space after you speak also invites the other person to share their thoughts, making the conversation feel more balanced and engaging.

Slowing down helps you avoid impulsive reactions, especially in tense situations, allowing you to diffuse misunderstandings before they escalate. It also gives you a chance to check in with your own feelings, leading to better communication and decision-making. And sometimes, stepping back—whether for a few seconds or a longer break—can help you regain clarity and approach the conversation with a fresh perspective.

If you’re feeling stuck in dating and relationships and would like to finally find your person, sign up for a complimentary 45-minute love breakthrough session with Sandy https://lastfirstdate.com/application

Join Your Last First Date on Facebook https://facebook.com/groups/yourlastfirstdate

Get Sandy’s books, Becoming a Woman of Value; How to Thrive in Life and Love and Choice Points in Dating; Empowering Women to Make Healthier Decisions in Love and Love at Last: True Stories of Falling in Love Later in Life



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